do over??!!

Sometimes people as me, "do you like being a nurse?" Depending on the day they ask my answer changes. I usually give a pat response of , "sometimes." I mean the job has its good days and its bad days and there is always a hint of resentment when it comes to the path I have taken.

I did not set out to be a nurse. I mean seriously, how many little boys grow up with the dream of being a nurse. I was the kid who thought about being a physician. I had the grades, smashed the SAT, but it was the funds that get me in the end. I could not afford college. I could not qualify for financial aid because my parents made WAY too much money and did not feel it would build character to pay for my college. However, they paid every cent of my older sister's tuition.

So, I paid for community college where I would go and then drop and a year or two later go again. Eventually I did earn an ADN and thought I was done. Later in my career I got the bug to return to school and now I cannot seem to stop. I finished my BSN and then decided I wanted a graduate degree and then a second one and now - oh I don't even want to go into what I am neck deep in at the moment.

But still, if I had it to do over again I would never have selected nursing. If I could magically go back in time and start again I think I would do something totally different. Architect sounds fascinating and I love houses and buildings, the design to possibility to use my creative side. Sounds like a dream job. Plus, it requires no ass wiping!

Another job I would have considered is one as a pharmacist. I loved all things science and I was a chemistry geek! I actually took additional chemistry classes as electives. Microbiology was also one of my favorites and could see myself on the side of research in a non-patient care role.

Alas, it is too late for me to start over. That is part of the reason I question others about their desire to become a nurse. I am usually blunt and give a good argument for selecting a different career path. I admit, I took the easy way out. A job I could work soon with little training. Little did I know the utter piles of shit that went along with the choice. However, it is my fault and mine alone for the path I have chosen and I am determined to make the best of it.

My overall goal is to teach at a university level and sprinkle my teaching with a healthy dose of reality. My instructors always painted a rosy picture of nursing - in short they lied! I have taught in a community college setting and found those evil children are uncontrollable and that is why a university setting is my goal.

I would love to update the college's nursing brochure to better reflect what the hell these kids are getting into. The typical brochure shows all these smiling faces and clean compliant patients. Yea! Right! Where are the restrained poo throwers? Where is the family who threatens to lawyer up? Where is the unreasonable physician who demands you walk the 500 lb pt in the halls QID? The fighting with pharmacy because the stat med you requested 5 hours still has not arrived? None of that is anywhere on the nursing brochure - trust me I have looked!